Boundaries & Conflicting Experiences

Often, setting boundaries with others who affect our well-being can feel both beneficial and heavy on the heart.

Setting boundaries with others can be beneficial because it helps protect our mental and emotional health. On the other hand, it can be emotionally challenging and feel heavy on the heart, as it might involve creating distance from people we care about or causing a significant change in our relationships.

I've noticed that my clients experience quicker recovery and more frequent moments of contentment when they approach setting boundaries with the following:

1. Approaching situations with curiosity
   

2. Acceptance that both progress and setbacks may coexist (and not avoidance of the less favored feeling or experience)
   

3. Identifying, expressing, and exploring difficult feelings and experiences
   

4. Identifying, exploring, and expressing gratitude for the small wins
   

5. Practicing and adjusting skills that help them respond to these circumstances

This is obviously an oversimplified version of the process. But I felt that someone might benefit from knowing that you're not alone if you feel "good and bad" about setting boundaries. And you can learn to set healthy boundaries and have healthier relationships. Working with a counsellor or mental health practitioner may help you navigate these conflicting experiences.

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😊If the above snapshot was insightful, you may like Nayana's quick take on: Seven Discomforts that can arise from counselling that can be integral to a client's progress.

Nayana (pronounced as "9na") is a Counsellor (HPCSA) in South Africa. She runs a counselling private practice online & in-person in White River, South Africa. Nayana believes that her client's are experts on their own lives and her role is to help them place things into perspective.

Feel free to contact Nayana if you'd like work with her in counselling. After-hours sessions are available online to accommodate those with busy schedules. College students discounts available.